To All Those Women


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To all those women who have full-time husbands and don’t really appreciate them, you can all go to hell. Yes, I know that’s abrupt and a bit nasty, but I don’t care. This post is aimed at women who don’t know how good they’ve got it. 

I’ve worked with women who whined because their husbands played golf or watched too much football or worked non-stop on the car or on the house. Their husbands were still there beside them every night, but they felt put upon because he had other interests besides them. Stupid ungrateful women.

My hubby was home for just over four hours today. Four HOURS. That was our “weekend”. He came in, we had lunch together, I did his laundry while he showered and took a nap. He watched the Preakness with me, he packed and left again. Yes, this was an unusual circumstance. There was some kind-of scheduling mix-up. This type of non-weekend doesn’t happen often. It still sucks. I’m still on the verge of tears. 
When we first began this trucking lifestyle seven years ago, some well-meaning women friends said how wonderful it would be to have the house/bed to myself and how they envied me. Stupid unthinking women. 

Being married to someone who spends their working life on the road is not easy. Days apart are hard. He’s just a voice on the phone. Some days he’s on the other side of the clock. He’s sleeping while I’m awake. Some days he can’t talk to me when I need him to, and I know there have been times when I’ve been unable to talk when he needs to hear my voice. 

Sometimes things break at home.

Sometimes I can’t sleep. 

Sometimes I cry. 

Sometimes I am not strong.

Sometimes he has a very bad day.

Sometimes he feels lonely.

Sometimes he’s tired and hurting.

Sometimes he needs a hug. 

To all those women who don’t appreciate what you have, you can kiss my behind. Being a trucker’s wife isn’t a situation I’d recommend. Most days I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. It’s hard, it’s lonely, and it hurts. 

Being my husband’s wife is all I’ve ever wanted to be. He just happens to be a trucker. 

To all those women who have a 24/7 husband, appreciate what you have, and be grateful. 

Images courtesy of Pinterest

Over Planning


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I have never been able to work with an outline. Hell, I usually don’t even have a solid plot in mind. I have a general, vague idea, and my stories or musings spring from there. I prefer to write as it comes to me, on the fly, off the top of my head, with my hands racing across the keyboard to get it all down before I lose it. I do my best work when I just write and let my fingers take me where they will. I ramble and wander, figuring it out as I go.

Worried how some of my creative efforts have meandered along, I spoke to my hubby, and he suggested that maybe working from an outline would give me direction and make for a tighter story. I freely admit that I don’t like outlines. If I write an outline, I almost never stick to it. I say too much in an outline because putting down cryptic bullet points makes no sense whatsoever to me. Why bother? Outlines always seemed so pointless.

Wanting to be a better writer, I gave hubby’s idea of using an outline a shot. I forced myself to sit down and made an outline. I researched ideas, and I wrote a framework for a novel. Using Scrivener, my favorite writing software, I researched characters, drafting up complete bios for them, complete with pictures of people found online who fit the idea of the people I had in my head. I researched and set up plots for scenes, and I created detailed places for the scenes to happen.

I wrote a prologue with an exciting opening scene. After the action of the prologue, I decided I’d go back in time two weeks and write about how the characters got where they were when the prologue scene happened. And, that was as far as I got. I waited for inspiration to hit, and I got nothing. My mind was a big, fat blank.

My problem with planning and plotting it all out is that now that I’ve done that, the story is already written in my head. It has a beginning, middle and an end, and the pure joy of writing it and creating it moment by moment is gone. I already know where the story will go and how it will end so I no longer feel the need to write it. It’s like I’ve opened the book and already read the ending. I’ve spoiled it for myself.

This stalled effort taught me an important lesson. Outlines don’t work for me. Too much planning puts a real damper on the joy of writing for me. I need the surprise of not knowing exactly where I’m going.

Images courtesy of Pinterest

Donna Reads: Dating-ish (Knitting in the City, #6) by Penny Reid


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The Blurb: There are three things you need to know about Marie Harris:
1) She’s fed up with online dating,
2) She’s so fed up, she’s willing to forego the annoyance and consider more creative alternatives, and
3) She knows how to knit.

After the most bizarre and irritating first date in the history of human kind, Marie is looking for an alternative to men. With the help of her friends, she quickly identifies a few possibilities:

Need a cuddle? Use a professional cuddler. Need affirmation? Get yourself a life coach. Need an orgasm? Try orgasm meditation! Why does she need the hassle of a romantic partner when she can meet all her needs with paid services?
But then her irritating date resurfaces. And he’s not at all the person she thought he was. And he suggests a different—and crazier—solution to her dilemma . . .
As everyone knows (or will soon come to realize), traditional relations between humans are a thing of the past. Robots are our future. And if robots are our future, then why do we need other people at all? 

My Review:

If it’s Penny Reid, you know it’s going to be a great book. Her stories are unique with wit and intelligence. Her characters have depth, and they become old friends rather quickly. You care what happens to them.

Journalist Marie Harris is tired of dating, and tired of waiting for the right man (her person) to come along. Marie’s perfect online dating match turns out to be a weirdo. He’s not who he says he is. He doesn’t look a thing like his profile picture, and when he starts to ask the most bizarre, detailed questions, she bolts from the date. Matthew Simmons is a college professor working on developing a compassion robot. Before he has a chance to explain to the intimidating and beautiful Marie and ask for her consent, she walks out on him. Marie decides to focus her next series of articles on the frustrations of single life and possible substitutes for real people. Exploring the various paid services out there (cuddle buddies, etc.), she never expects to run into Matt again.

I loved this cute story, and I loved Marie and Matt together. Do yourself a favor and pick up a copy of this one.

** I received an advanced reading from the author in exchange for an honest review.**


Donna Reads: Twist: A Dive Bar Novel by Kylie Scott


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Alexandra Parks is a graphic designer who works from home. She’s socially awkward and doesn’t let herself get close enough to anyone to have a real relationship. She’s been corresponding for months through an online dating website with Eric Collins, a bar owner in another state. They’ve gotten comfortable with each other, sharing their thoughts and feelings. When Eric suddenly stops writing, Alex decides to surprise him by flying in on his birthday. Alex’s happy surprise turns into a horrible nightmare when she arrives and Eric has no idea who she is. His brother, Joe, using Eric’s profile, has been her online suitor. Alex is mortified that she’s been lied to. 

Joe Collins has spent his life pleasing everyone else and living in his more popular brother, Eric’s shadow. He never meant to hurt Alex. After she runs out of the bar and walks to town in a rainstorm, she ends up sick and is forced to stay in town for a few days. She and Joe get to know each other better. 
This is the second book in the Dive Bar series. This series is just okay for me. Twist delves more into the lives of the people at the Dive Bar in Couer D’Alene. I think both Joe and Alex made some stupid decisions in this story, but they did both grow over the course of the book. I definitely enjoyed this installment more than I did the first book. 

A personal nitpick – Although I still prefer Ms. Scott’s Stage Dive series, I’m beginning to wonder if she needs to move past those characters. She keeps having them pop up in each new book. Maybe it’s time to let them rest and let the new characters stand on their own.