Last week I was having one of those feeling-sorry-for-myself kind of days. I wondered about my purpose in life.
I started out in life as a daughter. Am I still a daughter without parents? Mom’s been gone 8 years this year, and Dad has been gone for 26 years. He’s been gone for nearly half my life now. I was 28 when he died. I have such good memories of both of them. I am proud to be their daughter.
When I turned 30, I became a wife. I am still a wife although I have a “part-time” husband now. He is home for at least 30 hours every week. It’s become a lonely existence, though, and we struggle along with our sometimes long-distance relationship. I shoulder a lot of burdens by myself. I wish he was home more. Our weekends seem so rushed and hectic. I enjoy being a wife.
At age 31, I became a Mom myself. I was lucky enough to experience the miracle of life twice. I am still a Mom, but my sons are grown young men now. #1 is 22 and though he still lives at home, he works a full time job and comes and goes as he pleases. #2 is going to be 18 this summer and will graduate from high school in another few days. He soon will be working and driving and doing his own thing, too. I will always be a Mom, but my boys don’t need me as much as they used to. Sometimes I miss those days when I was the center of their world. Being a Mom is one of my proudest accomplishments.
I am also a student, a very good one. That will soon be done, too. I will then be able to proudly call myself a college graduate. I’m still not sure if I will be able to pursue the web design thing and make any money out of it, but I am super excited about my new skills. I have been having fun using them.
So to answer my earlier question of why am I here – I am here because my parents had a daughter who became an employee many years ago and then became a wife who became a mother and who later in life became a student. I am me, and I am proud of my many accomplishments. That is my purpose in life – just to be me. No one else can do it.