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What a horrible night’s sleep. I tried reminding myself that there are people in the world with real problems as I lay crying myself to sleep last night. It still made no difference. My heart wouldn’t listen.

Sending a husband back to work is a different thing for a trucker’s wife. His “day at the office” is much longer than the normal eight hours and his office is moving, usually hundreds of miles away from me. He’s back to being a voice on the phone or a text message.

truckerAfter spending nine nights lying beside him, hearing him breathe, last night was hard. My Fitbit says I got five hours of sleep with two times awake, nine times restless and twenty-five minutes awake/restless. Today I have a headache and swollen, scratchy eyes, and I, too, must return to work.

Back to the land of intense concentration and minute details. A job I enjoy and am grateful to have, but today I don’t want to be there. Ten days of vacation ended too soon.

Music is often the soundtrack of my life. Last night Velvet Revolver’s “Fall to Pieces” was stuck on the turntable in my head.

No, I’m not alone. I have my boys and my cats. The cat who tried to sleep with me last night must’ve thought I was crazy as I tossed and turned and clung to her.

I’ll get through today, and I’ll see my guy at week’s end, but after nine nights of having him there beside me, last night was hard, and last night hurt. Today will be hard, too. I will get through it.

Lyric video courtesy of YouTube and foreverslowly

All rights go to Velvet Revolver and RCA Records.